In order to help your grandchild thrive in today’s environment, here are some tips to make sure you are helping them as much as possible.

It Happens So Fast
Grandchildren change so quickly it's hard to keep up with them. You should be willing to try, though. For fast information on what to expect from grandchildren of any age, there is nothing better than the Internet. Numerous Web sites offer guidelines to all stages of child development, from birth through adolescence. A quick search can tell you what you need to know at any point in the growing-up process.

The Basics of Child Development
Grandchildren are complex little human beings. They are constantly changing in more ways than we can imagine. Here is a very general look at the social and emotional developments you can expect in grandchildren.

Infancy (birth to 2 years)
These are the years when you must childproof your home because at this age grandchildren like to learn about their environment using their mouths. This age group lacks self-control, cannot remember rules, and does not understand consequences. They are afraid of unfamiliar faces so you should always approach them slowly and carefully. Their journey towards becoming independent is just beginning. Let them feed themselves (despite the mess), play games with them, and read to them. Be prepared for temper tantrums and lots of "No." Hold, hug, rock, and cuddle them regularly.

Early childhood (3 to 8 years)
Between ages three and five, grandchildren begin to accept suggestions and follow simple directions. They like to try new things, take risks, and make their own decisions. They can share and take turns. They can be very bossy. They are aware of other people and their emotions are beginning to develop. Grandchildren ages six to eight are increasingly interested in making friends. They find criticism and failure hard to handle. They can work with others and take part in discussions with different points of view. They like jokes and riddles.

Later childhood (9 to 12 years)
Preteens want to spend time more time with their friends than with their family. They may challenge adult authority. Grandchildren this age compare their families to those of their friends—often unfavorably. They need love, support and positive role models more than ever.

Adolescence (13 to 18 years)
You may not see much of your grandchildren during this stage. They are forming lasting friendships with children their own age. Teenagers can be more tolerant and even-tempered than preteens, but they experience pain when relationships end. They take social and physical risks and like to discuss serious issues, especially those that affect teenagers.

If you understand child development, you can put temper tantrums into perspective. You can recognize that separation anxiety and stranger anxiety have nothing to do with you personally. Understanding and patience pays off. One of these days your granddaughter will take off her headphones and talk to you again. You just have to wait until she is ready and willing.

Extra Eyes and Ears
Parents are so close to their children that they sometimes miss early developmental problems. Take, for example, parent’s of a child who was born with a serious hearing loss. These two well-educated people never realized anything was wrong. The fact that their daughter didn't come when she was called or wouldn't talk on the telephone didn’t raise any red flags. Only when she began preschool did her teacher identify the real problem.

You can do the same for your grandchildren as the preschool teacher. If you think something isn't right, you need to raise the question with your children. As The Coordinated Campaign for Learning Disabilities says, "The only 'wrong' thing to do is to do nothing." Most developmental problems can be successfully treated if they are identified early.

This, Too, Shall Pass
It's important to know what normal behavior is for grandchildren at different ages. That way you are less likely to be hurt or disappointed when their behavior isn't exactly what you expected. There are too many good things about watching grandchildren grow up to let some passing phase upset you. Grandchildren need all the unconditional love you can give them - take a deep breath. You know from experience the stormy patches don't last forever. They're only around long enough to help you appreciate good weather when it arrives.

For more information about Denny Strecker, visit www.DennyStrecker.com or www.karateisgreatforyou.com. Denny can be reached by phone at (586) 573-3881.